My sister is having her baby!!!!!!!!!!! I am so excited because she does not know what she is having and she has not told us the names that she has chosen!!! It's driving me crazy...I knew I would be excited for this day but I did not know I would be this crazy!! I think it is because I know how much she has wanted to have a baby (she has kids already but has never actually given birth to one yet) and now she gets to do it. I just can't put into words the feelings that you have while you are in the hospital. Especially with your first one! At least she has some experience, I had little and I was so nervous I was not going to know what to do but once you hold that little miracle and look into their eyes you just know. You know you will do everything on earth to be the best mother you can be, you don't know it at the time but you will make sacrifices so that you are always putting the baby first, or at least you should!! I feel like I am a good mom, Shane tells me about everyday that I am the best and Abbey is lucky to have me as a mom- what a good husband I have! Shane tells me he sees me make sacrifices (small and big) all the time and honestly I really don't feel like I am, which is a good thing I guess! I used to be some what spoiled- thanks to my family and my sweet husband- ok I admit I was pretty darn needy! I feel now that I have focused my attention on Abbey and her needs, I don't feel as "high maintenance" as some of you like to call me!!! :) I know it was with love, don't worry. I am just saying that as mother's it is our job to provide for our families and I am so excited my sister is able to do so because it is the most rewarding job I have ever had.
Now onto a different subject while I am on a roll (thanks for 3 cups of full caff coffee I think!!!)- it is Lent and I had not given a lot of thought to what I was going to give up or focus on for this season until last Sunday. Oddly enough we went to Indian Creek, the Christian church, and not St Jude but it made me realize what my focus was going to be. We heard a sermon about loving the sinner and hating the sin. I am terrible about this- I am so quick to judge and not even realize I am doing so. In retrospect I feel horrible but I always do it, I form an opinion in my head and it is hard to shake once I have it in my thick skull. My goal is to do what Gary suggested, realize that there is a reason why the person is the way they are and try to get to know the person and learn what that reason is. This also got me to thinking about the Catholic church since it is the Lenten season and how many people are so turned off by the Catholic faith and I thought I would take some time and let everyone know why I like being Catholic. I am in NO way claiming to be an expert on the faith but I know why it is important to me! One I was born into a Catholic family and that is where intitally my faith began and started. I realize I was brought up in a Baptist home (thank you Mom and Dad!!) but I always had family in the Catholic faith- I think that whatever your faith is it only makes it stronger when you share it with family and friends. That brings me to my next point- I went to Marian College and that is when I decided to convert back to Catholicism- I was surrounded by great people and friends who were practicing Catholics and this made me feel good. One other thing I like is the rich tradition and symbolism of the Catholic faith. It is so hard for someone who is not familiar with the faith to walk in and feel comfortable because of all of the symbolic meanings that take place during mass, I can walk into about any other Christian church and totally understand what and why things are happening. This is not always the case with the Catholic faith but I can go to another Catholic church and feel comfortable because I know what to expect and sharing those acts of faith with others is comforting to me. We are doing those acts for the glory of God and by coming together as one church it is just powerful. I also like the fact that we celebrate and give so much recognition to Mary the mother of Jesus, this may be more important to me now that I am a mother myself...let me explain a little of what I mean...I often imagine what I would have done if I were Mary would I have been as strong as she was in accepting that I was pregnant miraculously? Would I have believed an angel? Come on how many angels have really came to you in a dream, vision or whatever how would you know you were just not out of your gourd when this angel came to you to tell you the "good news" of carrying the Savior of the Earth! Then to carry this baby, have the baby and hold him and raise him as your child only to know what his fate was going to be, what a strong faithful woman Mary was. I got scared when Zeke jumped on Abbey or when she acts like she is choking my heart jumps in my throat those things are SO minor in comparison of what Mary was going to face and have to watch her son endure. I think that by honoring Mary and acknowledging her role in the birth and life of Jesus is very important, we do not worship Mary as many like to say we honor her for the amazing task she was given. Obviously God saw something in Mary and Joseph to trust them with being Jesus's earthly parents so I only see it acceptable that we also remember their roles. I love all of the things I don't understand in the Catholic faith as well, I picked up a copy of Catholicism for dummies so I refer to that (or ask my mother-in-law!!!) when I don't understand something or need more clarification.
Now as for the Christian Church we attend we love that too- we feel challenged with the sermons that are presented to us and we are often called to action from the sermons. The sermons really stick with us through out the week and make us think about our faith on a daily basis. I also love the music and "worship" time it is lively and makes you feel good and be excited to be singing and showing praise.
This was in no way meant to offend anyone so please don't take it that way! I get a lot of questions asked about why we attend two Christian churches, maybe this has shed some light on those reasons. I enjoy attending both and plan to continue to do so, I plan to raise Abbey in essence in both churches and when she is old enough to commit to one she will be able to choose and we will support her decision. All I pray is that God is always a part of our lives as long as He is I don't think it should matter what church we attend. We support both churches and we are trying to be more active in both. I hope no one took this the wrong way we are to share our faith and be the salt of the earth and so hopefully this spoke to someone, if not then sorry you just read a novel!